Wednesday, October 20, 2010

The Waiting Game

I hate waiting. I'm not very good at it. I go crazy thinking about all of the "what ifs". I hop on the internet and research every single possibility to educate myself about those "what ifs". My mind races at a million miles per hour during my down time like when trying to get to bed at night, which in return leaves me with only a few hours of deep sleep. I wake groggy and start the process all over again. I hate waiting. I didn't realize the matching process would take such a long time. When I first started my surrogacy journey, for some reason I was under the impression that this would go quickly. I know there are Intended Parents looking at my profile. I know they are interested--the agency told me. But why is it taking so long? I hate waiting.

There is so much involved when being matched for surrogacy. It's not just about matching personalities and personal views between surrogate moms and the Intended Parents. It also includes lawyers, insurance, and other doctors. I have peace in knowing that all of the proper steps are being taken to match me with the perfect couple. It's just hard for me to sit back and wait. Did I mention I hate waiting?? :)

While I sit back and wait, I have really enjoyed looking at other surro moms' BLOGS online. I love reading their personal surrogacy stories, updates, and seeing pictures of their milestones. I also have connected with a few Intended Parents via their BLOGS online. It's really neat to hear the IP's point of view on the whole surrogacy adventure. This all just re-solidifies why I am taking this surrogacy journey and makes me THAT much more excited to get started!

I guess I should let you all know that one of the 3 IP's interested in my profile backed out. The couple from Los Angeles decided they wanted to go with a surrogate mom who has done this before. I'm ok with this and wish them the very best.

The couple from Hungary is getting close to saying "OK". Their doctors have reviewed my medical history. They are now working with a lawyer and an insurance company to see what they are up against before moving forward with the matching process. I did find out today that this couple would like to match with 2 surro moms. They want to grow their family now and not have to go through this process again down the road. I'm not sure how I feel about this. My first thought was that I don't want another surro mom embarking on MY journey, but then I quickly realized how neat it would be to rely on each other for support and grow a friendship together. I will have to sleep on it, talk with my husband Eric, and also rely on my support network.

Last but not least, I recently purchased a few books on surrogacy. Delivering Hope is a book on the extraordinary journey of a surrogate mom. I just read the first chapter last night and I'm hooked. I'm really looking forward to reading this book! The other book that I purchased was for my son Aiden called The Kangaroo Pouch. This book helps to introduce the concept of surrogacy to children. I don't want to read this book to Aiden too prematurely. I will wait until we are officially matched to do this.

Well, that's it for now.


Heidi said...

I hear you on the waiting! I filled out my application in March of 2009 and I am still "waiting". I guess you just have to hang in there and it will happen when it is meant to...Doesn't really make the waiting any easier does it? =)

Babydreams2011 said...

The perfect IP's are out there for you. This process is so daunting for us as well as the surrogate! I have no idea what additional hoops are thrown into the game with an agency in the mix, but i am sure there is a lot of "i" dotting and "t" crossing that will add some time onto the wait, but that will just make your journey safer and less stressful in the long run I would imagine. Best of luck and I am anxiously following along with you!

Kelly & Her Uterus said...

Waiting is the worst . . . but eventually movement happens! Hang in there!!!

My kids loved the Kangaroo Pouch- I actually just gave my copy to a mom from my daughter's school who just applied to be a surrogate.