Last belly shot 11/15/12 42 weeks pregnant |
Saturday morning, November
17th at 2:00am - the morning of my scheduled cesarean section - contractions
awake me from my sleep.
Could this be it? Am I really in labor? No, I can't be.
But how freaking amazing will it be if I really am in labor!?! I've never gone into labor on my own, so I wasn't sure if this was the real deal or not.
I lay in bed
counting how many contractions I’m having, how far apart they are, and how long
they are lasting. Man, these are close together; 3 to 5 minutes apart but
manageable. I get out of bed and head to the bathroom. More mucus plug on the
toilet paper. (I started losing my plug the day before.) I keep moving and walk
laps around my upstairs to see if the contractions continue. They do and I am
ecstatic!
Keeping track of contractions |
It’s now 3:00am. I start writing down each contraction on the first
thing I could get my hands on - a box of breast milk storage bags. They are still 3 to 5 minutes apart and lasting about 45
seconds to one minute long. I start squatting through each contraction to see
if I can make some progress in helping Peanut descend into my
pelvis. After a few more contractions in the squatting position I feel a small,
warm gush between my legs. I jump up and run to the bathroom to check it out.
Not sure if it's more mucus plug or a small water leak? I wipe and notice a small
pink tinge on the toilet paper. Bloody show maybe? I don’t know, but it’s
looking like progress to me! I get into a squatting position in the bathroom
with my underwear off. I bear through a few more contractions in that position
and look down to notice more watery slimy stuff on the floor. Crap, things are
happening! I’m so excited but don’t want to wake anyone just yet. I wanted to
enjoy this moment all to myself. I’m in labor, people! I've never gone into
labor on my own, so this was awesome and I was so proud of my body.
I continue to walk around and breathe
through the contractions. It’s just after 4:00am now. I hop into the shower for
some relief and to shave my legs and other areas. I've heard that if you take a
shower and contractions subside that it could be false labor. Well, my
contractions kept on coming! Getting a bit stronger now where I have to stop
what I'm doing and really concentrate and breathe through each contraction.
I’m out of the shower and I get dressed. From all the commotion and moving
around my husband awakes. I tell him I think it's time. "No way, are you
serious?", he says. I give him a kiss and tell him I think I'm headed to
the hospital soon and that I will call him as soon as I have an update. The
kids were home and still sound asleep and I didn't want to disrupt anyone with
childcare so early in the morning so I let my husband sleep.
Down stairs I went to wake my friend Amy who
had arrived back into town late the night before. She wasn't going to miss this
birth and I wasn't going to allow it, so we flew her back out for the weekend
since we had the C-section date scheduled. I told Amy I think it's time -
contractions are 3 to 5 minutes apart. "No way, really?", she said as
she jumped up off the couch. I sit down and breathe through a few more
contractions. Amy realizes I wasn't kidding and heads upstairs to take a quick
shower. I called my Doula to let her know what was going on.
It’s now 5:00am
and things are continuing on, steady at 3 to 5 minutes apart, but still only
lasting 45’ish seconds or so. By this time I was hoping to see the contractions
lasting longer, especially since I was staying active, but they weren't. As I’m bouncing around on my exercise ball I
call A and M to let them know what was up. “You aren't going to believe this,
but I’m in labor!” In the middle of our conversation I had to pause and breathe
through another contraction. We all
decided since I was to be at the hospital at 9:00am anyways for my scheduled C-section,
we might as well pack up and head there a little early so Peanut and I could be
monitored. Just after 6:00am we were out the door.
At my last OB appointment
my doctor mentioned that if I went into labor on my own that she would allow me
to try and labor successfully. I was so excited to put the surgery on hold to
see if I could attempt this VBA2C after all. Amy and I arrived at the hospital
and met A and M out front. We all exchanged hugs and headed inside for the
labor and delivery unit. I couldn't believe this was happening. Nothing like the
threat of a C-section to throw you into labor! I was so proud.
Checking out Peanut on the monitor. He's doing great! |
Once checked in, they
hooked me up to monitors and checked me for progress. I was 80-90% effaced with
no dilation and baby still very high, -3 station, and cervix tiled way back.
Not really what I wanted to hear after being in early labor since 2am. My
doctor finally arrived around 7:30am. She said I can continue to try and labor
on my own, but that we need a game plan if things do not progress (like my past
history of laboring with my son that ended in my first C-section due to no progression).
I wasn't ready to talk games plans yet; I just wanted to see what my body was
going to do over the next few hours first. My doctor respected my wishes and
told me to get up and walk, walk, walk. Finally, we were assigned a room of our
own to put our things down and off to walking we went.
Breathing through a contraction as my Doula massages my back. |
Around and around the
labor and delivery floor we walked, stopping every so often so I could
concentrate and breathe through each contraction. My Doula was by my side massaging
my back each time I stopped. Contractions were still 3 to 5 minutes apart and
only lasting 45 seconds to one minute long.
It is now 8:00am and I was told to
go back into my room so I could be monitored for 30 minutes. Peanut was doing
great and hanging in there during each contraction. My doctor came back in the
room and told me I had one more hour to walk, walk, walk, and then she was
going to check me for progress. Back to walking we went. Around and around the
labor and delivery floor, pausing and breathing slowly and deeply through each
contraction.
My entourage as we walked around L & D. |
Breathing through a contraction as my Doula comforts me with her magic touch. |
A and M looking over me as I'm being checked for progress by my doctor. |
9:30am rolls around
quickly and I’m back in bed to get checked by my doctor.
No progress; nothing at
all.
I am devastated. Tears roll
down my face. I have been defeated - again. My body is not meant to birth
babies vaginally. I gave it my best shot. At least I can say that I tried. We
chatted about my options - I can continue on all day with my contractions still
the same and no progress being made, or we can move forward with the C-section.
My Doula, whom I love and trust immensely, tells me that if I haven’t made any
progress by now, I most likely won’t make any more progress if I choose to
continue on, but that whatever I decide she supports me 100%.
The loving embrace of my amazing doctor. |
I am 42 weeks
pregnant. I've been laboring since 2:00am with no progression what so ever. It’s
time to make a decision - my decision. I did not feel pressured at all. I knew
in my heart what the right decision was, even if it tore my heart into a
million pieces. It’s time for the C-section. My doctor hugged me and through
her tears said how proud she was of me for all that I have accomplished. My Doula laid her comforting hands on my body and my IPs both embraced me with their
support and love.
Accepting the reality of a C-section and "The Team" standing by my side to comfort and support me. |
I then asked for the
nurse to give me something to stop the contractions. If I was headed back for a
C-section, I didn't want to deal with these damn contractions any longer! That
seemed to break the ice and we were all able to smile again.
M cooling me off with a wet paper towel as I power through the last of my contractions. |
I called my husband and
told him to get down here because I’m going into surgery soon. He wasn't going to
be in the delivery room, but I wanted to kiss him goodbye before they took me back and I
wanted him to be there at the hospital just in case anything were to happen to me. The
nurse continued to hook up my IV and my blood was drawn for Peanut’s cord blood
kit. Amy, A and M got suited up in blue paper scrubs. Amy took the place of my
husband in the delivery room so that she could take all of the birth photos.
M, Amy, and A ready and waiting for Peanut's arrival! |
It’s minutes now before we
have to head back into the OR. My husband is nowhere to be found and all of my
calls are going straight to voice mail. The nurse sees that I really want to see
my husband before we head back so she very slowly takes care of last minute
preparations and paperwork. I can’t thank her enough for that.
It’s time to go and still
no husband to be found. We slowly walk out of my room and past the elevators as
we’re walking towards the OR. It sounds like someone is coming up. We pause to
see if my husband steps off the elevator. It’s not him. I take a deep breath as
we walk through the doors leading into the operating room. It’s go time.
Walking back to the operating room. |
A, M, and Amy wait just
outside the doors as I head back to get prepped with a spinal and laid out on
the table. The anesthesiologist had a hard time with the spinal. I have
scoliosis, so that wasn't a surprise. A few cuss words from me and it was done.
They laid me back on the table, raised the curtain and got started. A, M, and
Amy are now allowed into the room. A and M stayed near the baby warmer while
Amy came over to sit by my head. I start giggling. For what reason, I don’t
know. I think the anesthesiologist slipped me something to take the edge off.
Whatever it was, it helped.
A and M sharing one last moment before the birth of their son. |
Lots of tugging and
pulling and pressure was felt. Peanut was in there good. They ended up having
to use the suction thingy on his head to help pull him down and out. I remember
they had to do the same thing with my daughter, as well.
At 11:48am my Peanut, Ari
Isaac, was brought into this world!
He weighed in at a whopping 8 pounds, 5
ounces and he was 21 inches long.
Well hello there, beautiful. Welcome to the world. There are so many people who already love you dearly... |
As soon as I heard Peanut’s
first cry, tears poured down my face. I did it. I created a family. I
successfully grew this beautiful child in my womb for 42 weeks and now he is
placed into the loving arms of his amazing daddies whom I love so very much. I am
so proud. What an incredible experience! I may not have gotten the vaginal birth
that I so badly wanted and planned for, but Ari’s birth was beautiful just the
same.
I am so thankful for my
friend, Amy, who took so much time away from her own family to be here with me
(twice!) and to take pictures of this incredible birth. I will never forget
this moment and I now have so many beautiful pictures to remind me of this
amazing, life changing experience.
To be continued......
For Peanut's Birth Story - The Recovery, CLICK HERE.
11 comments:
Amazing, amazing, amazing. Makes me want to do it all over again!! So proud of you for your strength and love for Peanut and his daddies. XOXO!!!! Natalie
OK...I just cried tears of joy from this story. Gotta go get tissues. Thank goodness boys don't wear mascara or I'd be a total mess!
This is so beautiful, Annie! I'm beyond thrilled that you got to experience what it's like to go into labor naturally (I still haven't managed that one), and to labor awhile before the c-section. I'm glad you made the decision with peace, and I'm so happy for you, and those three boys!! What a blessing you are to their lives. <3<3<3
A HUGE congrats to you and the IF's! That was a wonderful blog and such an amazing story. You did make a family and that is a blessing!! Surrogacy Rocks!
Much love,
Fatima
Great story Andrea, and very well written! Sorry you didn't get the birth you wanted but it sounds, and looks, like it was still amazing! And such amazing pictures you have now, they capture the moments so well...well done Amy!! Congrats to you Andrea for growing that strong healthy peanut and to your IFs for welcoming their first born to their family!! <3
WOWY WOWY!!! u see I've never given birth...The ONLY birth I've experienced was when Nicole had Judah (her son)... Just A M A Z I N G.... Wonderfully written, such a great humanitarian you are to provide a family for these wonderful gentlemen...SOOOO proud of my Cousin! Love you Sweetness...
SO Beautiful. Great job Andrea! So proud to know ya! XOXO
Amazing story!! You did a great job!
OMG!!! BEAUTIFUL!! Tony and I are BOTH bawling right now!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEANUT!!! And how the heck do you manage to look BEAUTIFUL while you are having major surgery?!?
You're so wonderful Annie. I'm proud to call you my friend :)
Tears and more tears! SUCH a beautiful birth story. JUST READING this makes me anxious to go again!!! <3
You are a beautiful person inside and out. I'm so glad i've had the chance to get to know you!
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